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Every year for the past eight years, I have visited a cemetery on Memorial Day. Until this year, it has been the Tahoma National Cemetery in Kent, Washington. It is administered by the United States Department of Veterans Affairs, and it is the only national cemetery in the state of Washington.
There are more than 60,000 people buried there.
Among those, and the primary reason for my visit, is my dad, Charles Garvin. When my sister and I chose the marker for his grave, we decided on the inscription, “Legacy of family, beauty, and God.” Dad’s legacy was evident in all he did. He cared for his family. He loved and honored art, both as a viewer and as a creator. He also devoted his life to God.
Yesterday, we visited my father-in-law’s, Robert Collier’s, grave. Robert’s marker simply indicates his name, birth, and death dates.
As long as I knew my father-in-law, some 24 years, his life was characterized by the legacy he intentionally left behind for his family. He was always working on another book, Grandpa’s Story Books 1, 2, and 3, Becoming Myself, and the stories he pulled together of his parents. Robert Collier certainly left a legacy. As I think about that legacy the words that come to mind are similar to my own dad’s. Family, with ten children and a progeny approaching, or exceeding, a hundred, he certainly left a large family. A family that he deeply cared about.
Robert was also a devoted Christian. He served faithfully in leadership positions in his churh for many years.
Whereas my dad’s life was a reflection of beauty, with all the arts, Robert’s life, in my mind, is characterized more by frugality. He could pinch a penny harder than anyone I’ve ever known. Because of his frugality, he was able to leave behind 29 acres of the family homestead. Acreage that now forms the Collier Cove Nature Preserve, which contains trails I and many others enjoy regularly.
My life is richer because of the legacy left behind by these two good men.
As I pondered both their legacy, and my mother’s, yesterday, I began to reflect on what legacy I want to be leaving behind. That legacy might be honored in memory, but it is created by the choices I make every day. What are the memories I am creating today, so that others will be better tomorrow?
Yesterday, when I posted Happy Memorial Day in my Facebook group, I was challenged by one group member that Happy and Memorial Day don’t go together. That position added to my reflections yesterday. In my response I said, “they died, in part, so we can enjoy the happiness and the freedom for which they fought.”
I believe we can create a brighter, happier world. A place where people are free to share their authentic stories, a reflection of the lives and the legacies they are creating. As I learned from the memories I reflected on yesterday, I recognize that creating a brighter, happier world comes with a cost. It comes from a life of dedication and determination.
It is my hope that we leave happy memories of the battles we’ve fought for others. Whether those battles are fought in military uniforms or other types of uniforms, their memories and their lives can be reflected in the lives we live today.